I found this short article fascinating:
In a recent article in Inc. Magazine, Les McKeown shares these thoughts:
3 Signs That You’re a Martyr, Not a Leader
#1) You’re a Bottleneck… and you secretly like it!
Martyr-leaders have unfulfillable commitments, impossibly Herculean to-do lists, and triple-booked schedules – all for the purpose of generating the warm, comforting glow of indispensability.
#2) Your Default Mood is Self-Pity
Watch a martyr-leader as he goes about his daily business, and you will find two primary attitudes on display: poor me and head-shaking sigh.
#3) You Exude Learned Helplessness
Martyr-leaders live in a self-taught state of mind wherein nothing is ever truly fixable and everything is a mess – and expect the rest of us to feel the same.
This is Russ writing again…
I looked up the word “martyr”, and one of the definitions is the following: “A person who displays or exaggerates their discomfort or distress in order to obtain sympathy or admiration”.
Do you know leaders like this? Are you one of them?
I think at times I have used “martyr-like” words and actions in my leadership…
*When I feel overwhelmed, I want others to identify with me or at least know that I’m struggling
*When asked how I am, and I respond, “I’m really busy”. This is more of a statement of being unorganized then of good leadership.
*Yes, I have exaggerated at least once or twice in my leadership, looking for either sympathy or for people’s worship.
I don’t want to be a martyr-leader. Do you?
There’s a big difference between being a leader that shares needs or asks for help and being a leader that uses guilt to manipulate people’s feelings and people’s dependence. This is a sign of a “Reluctant Leader”: A leader that has the tools to lead, but just won’t take the ownership and responsibility to make it happen.
Are you a martyr-leader?
Are you doing any of the 3 things the article talks about above?
What can you do TODAY to change that?