34 Leaders from 10 countries joined together for four days and developed these “Basic Coaching Habits for anyone asked to be a “coach”. When coaching someone, we must:
#5) Create a Safe Place. We need to make sure we do not share what the other person discusses with us with another person, or at least, make sure we have their permission. Make sure you meet in a private, safe place. The goal is to establish a level of trust between us.
We hear the stories of the cities of “refuge” in the Bible. This is where someone who had committed a crime could go and be safe while they worked out the problem.
In the same way, we are to be “safe places” for people as they work out their problems.
There were three things about these cities of refuge that apply to us as coaches:
#1) They were to be easy to get to. We can learn something from this. If we are going to coach someone, than make it easy for them to get to us. Now, many of us are busy with other things as well, so we may have to set times when we can talk with others. We may have to make ourselves available to our staff first, before we are willing to see anyone else. But, if we agree to coach someone, then we need to make it easy on them to find time with us. They need to become a part of our schedule.
#2) No harm could come to them while they were there. This is where we have to learn to accept them, problem and all. Jesus loved the sinner while he hated the sin. We need the same attitude. From there, we can start them on their journey to recovery. They should never leave us feeling defeated, judged or hurt. They should always feel loved. Reconciliation is the word that describes what we do as coaches, we reconcile them with their solution. We may need to stand beside them and protect them as they move through this.
#3) They were safe as long as they were working on their problem. Part of feeling safe is for the person we are helping to know that we will not tell anyone about our conversation. True, there may be some legal issues here, but, for the most part, we cannot violate the confidential information we have. It is also a good idea to give some homework to help learning and growth, perhaps something to do or read or think about or to discuss between times together.
What we want is for the other person to want to see us as their coach.
To track the 10 Habits, CLICK HERE