“I got burned on trust. I trusted them and thought they trusted me, but they used me. Sometimes I hate trust. It hurts when I put myself out there and they take me for granted.” These are all thoughts I have had in the last few months.
When I think of trust I think about trusting others. The problem is that if I am going to trust others – I must take responsibility to become a trusted person myself. In trust, take responsibility for yourself. In the book, The Trust Edge by David Horsager, he says “when you focus on increasing your trust edge, you will enjoy greater success and impact. When we change ourselves we have the best chance of affecting our organizations, relationships, families and the World.”
Horsager mentions what will happen if we have that trust edge:
- Leaders will see expanded influence and increased morale.
- Managers will see greater productivity and increased commitments from teams.
- Salespeople will see increased engagement and results.
- Service experts will see enthusiastic recommendations and loyal customers.
- Parents will see more peace and freedom at home.
- Teachers will see more respect, impact and classroom control.
I need to be a trusted person. To be a trusted person I need to be transparent. This is a quality I learned from my Dad. He could be transparent even if it might put him at a disadvantage. He would admit to mistakes. He would show his errors, but then he would also show how to fix them. He would take responsibility for what he did wrong and then give credit to others when things went right.
In our organization, we try to be transparent. If we are upset, we don´t hold it in until it explodes. We confront right away, even when it hurts or is hard to. We go at it the moment we find out something is wrong. We don´t wait a week to see if it might work itself out – we instead confront the issue to resolve it right away. What also happens is that I have others confronting me. They say, “you said this in the meeting and that was offensive.” I have a choice to make: Do I respond in a defensive tone, or do I accept my mistake. Sometimes the natural response is, “who do you think you are telling me that.” The right response is, “How can I learn from my mistake” or “ how can we grow together in this.”
Trust will give you an advantage that will cause you to grow and your organization to grow more than you ever expected. It is important to be transparent in trust.
Defend what you must defend. Correct what you must correct. But look in the mirror before you do it.
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