In any relationship, our tendency is to begin by telling our story, or telling about us. We want to position ourselves quickly as a leader, an expert, someone with experience, or someone with authority.
Have you ever been a part of a group of people, and in the course of conversation, someone directs questions at you instead of telling about themselves? What happens? You’re drawn to them. You engage with them. They are showing an interest in you! It’s actually “counter cultural” to ask questions first, but it’s a great thing!
We need to learn to ask “GREAT” questions. This will determine the course for any coaching relationship we are in. Here are some thoughts:
Don’t start with the issue. Build your relationship. Ask questions that help you get to know the other person. Ask questions that help you understand the other person.
Don’t be content with short, shallow answers. Dig a little bit. The information and rapport you’re building will make a difference.
•Ask Specific Questions
The more specific you are in your questions, the better. Track your questions as you’ll use the information you learn in your ongoing relationship.
Here are a couple of tip sheets that talk about asking questions:
Questions You Should Ask Yourself